Monday, July 30, 2007

On a Long List of Things I Just Don't Understand

A conversation I don't think I will ever have with you goes something like this:

Hey, how's it going? Come on in and have a seat. Can I get you something to drink? I just need to finish getting ready but it will only take a minute for me to put on my PRESS-ON TOE NAILS before we leave.


Friday, July 27, 2007

I Think I'm Headed in the Wrong Direction

So this devil guy really freaks me out.

He's at each stage of the Tour de France (taunting) cheering on the riders, so I've seen him quite a bit on TV. And as fate, and my overactive imagination spurred on by diet pills would have it, I had SUCH a creepy nightmare last night, featuring devil guy.

I was stranded on a road in the desert and the sun was just going down and I am feeling scared and thirsty, I see a car in the distance coming toward me so I stick out my thumb to catch a ride, as the car approaches I see that it is devil-guy driving a cherry red vintage 1970 El Camino, windows unrolled, with Santana's "Oye Como Va" blaring from the radio, speeding straight toward me. He screeches to a stop beside me, the passenger door opens and he booms out in this huge Darth Vader voice, "GET IN!". I felt absolutely terrified.

I did one of those big physical jolts and woke myself up with that scared feeling in the pit of my stomach.

So I'm almost afraid to ask... WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT ANYWAY?


Wednesday, July 25, 2007

It's Been a Long, Long Time

Well, hello! I’ve missed you.

Here are some things I’ve been up to since we last spoke:

Cheering Levi Leiphemer of the Discovery Channel Team on to victory in the Tour de France. He’s currently in fourth place, but I hope this Billings, Montana native can work it out over the next few days. You should watch the fabulously weird, charming animated movie The Triplets of Belleville for a look at the love the French have for their annual Tour. (The soundtrack to that film is tres magnifique, too).

Watched La Vie en Rose and am now totally intrigued by Edith Piaf and her crazy life.

Commissioned a feasibility study to gage public interest in beginning a Michael Vick’s Gotta Go campaign. Creep.

Got my hair cut really, really….really short.

Busting hump at work putting together the education and outreach plan to accompany Ken Burns upcoming multi-part series, The War. Watch this documentary beginning on September 23 my friends, it will be amazing. And find your local public television’s web site – I bet they will be hosting a World War II story collection site for your community and you should submit the war stories from your family. They will live on in a permanent archive.

Became utterly obsessed with Bear Grylls and Man vs. Wild on the Discovery Channel. Watched an entire marathon on a Sunday. That’s a huge emotional commitment, you know? The news broke that he was a bit of a fraud on Tuesday. I continue to mope. Shame on you, Bear. You led us to believe that we, too, could hack our way out of the Sierra Madres or the Amazon rain forest or the Sahara desert with a positive attitude, a flint, and the occaissional grub worm or raw fish for dinner. When really you meant that we needed room service and a good massage after a dip in the hot tub.

Started a diet that involves my doctor’s supervision and prescription-strength diet pills. Because I need another addiction.

Discovered that I love smoked salmon.

Found some of the ugliest Birkenstock-esque shoes that you have ever seen and actually put them on, only to discover that they are the most comfortable shoes in the universe and have cured my always-achy high-arched feet. And by “found” I mean my mom handed them to me and forced me, against my will, to try them on and admit that they were the solution to my problem, but only after she had to listen to me moan about how hideous they looked and how much I hated the store we were in. When I wear these shoes, I can actually feel my leg hair growing faster and I have no desire to shave. But man oh man, do my feet ever feel good.

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Friday, July 06, 2007

She Has Blue Hair...Really!

You have to visit my friend Good Beth's blog at

Here's a picture of Beth. She's the blue-haired beauty next to the blonde-haired beauty, April.

I've been wanting to write about the influence that different friends have had on me, but since I don't seem to write about anything anymore, for now I'll just tell you that Beth is one of the smartest, most insightful, funny people you will ever meet. Ever.

And we have to be clear that I have two Beths in my life, and I'm talking about the Good Beth. Because there's a difference...

If I was writing a love poem about Beth it would say things like her ripple effect is strong, she's blessed with awareness and she has a wise, old soul. But I'm not writing that soliloquy because I've become too lazy to actually write anything.

Beth's recent blog entries absolutely crack me up, so, enjoy!


Sunday, July 01, 2007

A World of Difference

A few things came together in the just the right way for me this morning and have left me feeling good. Lighter, more refreshed, somehow. It happened while reading the paper.

I am such a fan of pundit and syndicated columnist Kathleen Parker. She is classified as a moderate conservative, but I put heavy emphasis on the "moderate" because I do think she resides comfortably in the middle area, give or take a few slides further right every now and then. I find myself agreeing with her take on things most of the time.

Her column today was one of her more simple, but I just loved it because it told the story of two extremes, contrasting the political protester who's been dubbed "Rage Boy" with Paul Potts, the singer who won a British televised talent show. Read it here.

When I say that things came together, I mean that first, I really like the writings of Kathleen Parker. Second, I am so concerned with all of the anger and hate mongering coming from EVERYONE these days and Rage Boy is just one example of what is freaking me out. Third, I am a COMPLETE FOOL for a good underdog-wins story, and Paul Potts is a rock star in my book. And finally, there is something truly special about the Nessun Dorma song, Puccini's gift to humanity. Even if you don't know opera, you know this song because you've heard it in movies and televised concerts and even cartoons. It truly brings on chills for me and most of the time I tear up when I hear it because it is such a moving song. If you aren't familiar, go to iTunes and download it right now because you won't be disappointed.

Here is the YouTube clip of Paul Potts singing Nessun Dorma.

Quoting Ms. Parker, "Not everyone has the natural talent to sing an aria, obviously, but everyone has the voluntary will to see beyond one's personal wounds and to view narcissistic rage for what it is."

So, chill out Rage Boy.